suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
