Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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