Pregnant stripper...not hot.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
