Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I have aggressive nipples.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
