They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Randomize
