I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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