The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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