Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
