i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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