Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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