So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
