maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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