He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
