So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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