so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
bring money and cleavage
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
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