I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
