Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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