North Korea, Best Korea!
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
