Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
