so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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