I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
It's never too late to be topless.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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