Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
