Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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