I'm eating all of the evidence.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
