holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
