that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
