Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
be right there i have to get my cape
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
