I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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