idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
