Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Randomize
