HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize