office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize