i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
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