Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I think people are normalizing furries
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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