yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Text me some of your sweat
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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