yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
The Olympian is in my bed
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
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