my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
should my penis look like a turkey
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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