I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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