Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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