So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize