Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
