I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
