ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
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