508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
