i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
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