I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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