Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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