That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
