i would punch a child for taco bell
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
