I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
